Wishin' on a sunrise
by Ohsoup
Summary: Deidara is doing something that's ruining his mornings. Sasori helps him remember better ways to spend them. [Sasodei][yaoi] READ THE PRESTORY STUFF! M for future chapters.
1. Prestory

_**PRE-STORY ARTICLES**_

This is to get all the claims and stuff out there before I get to the actual story. Contains summaries, my feelings towards the story and, of course, the warnings. _**IF YOU DO NOT READ THIS, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO BLAME ME FOR ANYTHING BUT A BADLY WRITTEN SMUTFIC.**_

Article 1:** I DO NOT OWN NARUTO! **

Though I wish to high heaven I did, it never happened. Maybe that's because I dislike god for what he's done to me?... At any rate, I don't own Sasori or Deidara, or any other character in this story except the one that wasn't given a name. That blessed privilege is Masashi Kishimoto's.

Article 2: **WARNINGS!!**

The things you may have a problem with if you read this are:

Homosexuality,

graphic sexual description of homosexuality (LATER in story, not for at least 2 or 3 chapters),

Deidara acting slightly whore-ish,

minor gory topic (specifically, implied cannibalism. No graphic descriptions, thank you.),

Newb-ish writing,

Light cursing,

and an implied death.

I will say here and now, IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ ABOUT ANY OF THESE , _CLICK THE BACK BUTTON NOW_. THEY WILL BE THERE, SHOULD YOU CONTINUE. I will not change my story unless I think the wording needs tweaking. Flaming is NOT tolerated, and will promptly be laughed at then deleted.

Article 3: **SUMMARRY**

The person Deidara wants most, he feels he can't have. So he does something at night that ruins his mornings. Sasori helps him find better things to do with his mornings.

Article 4: **AND HOW DOES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL???**

My feelings toward this story are actually surprisingly affectionate. I never intended to make something to put on the 'net when I wrote the first chapter, but the beginning turned out so nicely, I had to play with it more. Really, this started as a simple way to pass the time. I was only on the compy because it was 5:00 a.m. and I hadn't been able to sleep, so I had to use my hands, and I didn't feel like drawing. But still, I love it. It's my child and I love it to death, no matter what. (Yes, I consider all my works my children, even if I don't own the people in them. XD) I've gotten into a bit of a Sasodei rut, so I really wanted to use them in something I made. And, YES, I realize this universe is a bit off. So what? Most of it stays true to the universe standards, or so I think...

--------

So there. That's my rant, all for you. If I left anything out, please don't hesitate to correct my errors.

Since you're still reading this, I assume you want to read the story. So, without further ado...

TO THE STORY! flies off

(oh, wait, one last thing...the normal perspective in this story is Deidara's POV. Just so you know. Nyann!)


	2. CH 1: Black sunrise

The sunlight in the room is nearly blinding. I realize the softness I'm encased in is my blanket, and with that I know I've just woken up. This is my room.

I sit up in bed to stare at the form beside me. I fight an urge to chuckle. He's so much smaller than me... nobody could ever guess I was the one on the bottom.

I run hands through short red locks. So cute and shaggy. Almost like a little dog.

He mutters in his sleep, then turns over.

My eyes widen, I can feel it.

It's not him.

This person isn't him. He's just remarkably similar. No, not even...nobody could truly compare to the one I want to be here, beside me, comfortable and safe.

It's not Sasori-Danna.

He stirs. His eyes open, round and young and...green? Even his eyes aren't right. He smiles.

"Good morning, beautiful..." He whispers, propping himself up and holding me like it means something.

But it doesn't. Not to me.

"Shut up, un." I hiss. Whoops. I didn't mean to sound that harsh.

He looks at me with disbelief, his happy little moment shattered perfectly. I won't lie, it's a practice I've become used to. Breaking things, blowing things up...yeah. Exactly my specialty.

"You alright, Dei?" He asks.

Idiot. I don't even know your name!

"You're NOT allowed to call me that, un. Only one person can do that, un, and you're not even close to what he is. And why the hell would I be alright, whoring myself out to some stupid wuss like you, un?" I make sure to put as much poison in my voice as possible. I'm not even faking. Danna would be proud.

The other simply stares at me in shock. "But, Deidara, I-"

"_Get. __**Out**__. Un!_" I growl. The poor bastard, having to hear this first thing in the morning. But it can't be helped. He quickly stands, frightened by the change of heart I'm showing him, and pulls the blanket over himself. With a straight face, I tell him off further, pouring all my misplaced frustration on the unfortunate soul. "Go down the hallway to the left, un. When you see the third door to the right, go right on in and you're home free." His expression's currently changing from disbelief to rage. To rub it in his face more, I add, "Go on, un! Now! And don't let the door hit you on the way out, un!"

Now, he's definitely pissed. Folding the blanket all around himself, he storms off in a huff, slamming the door and following my directions without a second thought.

I hate this part, but it has to be done. Even if I didn't reject him completely, he knows about the Akatsuki location. If he lives, there's no telling how he'd react to a wanted poster of me, or, for that matter, any of my fellow Akatsuki. Who knows? Next instant we'd be up to our necks in ANBU and bounty hunters and god knows what else. It's the best thing I can do for him to push his heart away for these final moments of his.

My directions aren't to the exit, no.

They're to Tobi and Zetsu-kun's room. And Zetsu HATES having intruders on his and his Tobi-chan's privacy. (Why Zetsu-kun wants basketball-face brat is a mystery to me. Maybe he's got a pumpkin fetish?...)

He'll be dead quickly, at least.

I sigh, waiting for the customary scream of terror to wake the Akatsuki. I get up and start to pull on my clothes. After my pants and netted shirt are in place, I slip on my headband.

A sign of treason, and a reminder of home. An eyesore and a comfort.

And as close to a physical mask for emotion as I'll ever wear.

----

(narrator POV)

"I swear, I don't know who keeps sending those tasty men into my room every morning, but I'd sure as hell like to thank them. That's for sure!" Zetsu babbled to no one in particular. Tobi looked kind of sick. Deidara held back a sigh. Cannibalism (or, in the case of Zetsu, semi-cannibalism) was NOT supposed t be a breakfast topic. Especially when almost all of the Akatsuki was present. Homicidal killers, human-eating discussion, and fresh eggs just never really mix.

Hidan sighed. "Oh, for Jashin's sake! Do you ever think past your fuckin' stomach?!?"

Zetsu rolled his eyes. "My stomach is quite incapable of doing that."

The silver-haired man glared. "Bitch all you want _when_ _I finish my talkin'_, Oreo!" Zetsu glared, but Hidan, clueless as to his audience, went on. "Personally, I think whoever it is is a damnable slut!"

Deidara nearly choked on a pancake. It was definitely an '_oh NO you didn't!_' kind of moment. However, he couldn't reveal himself by defending said slut. That'd be torture and suicide on a silver platter.

Unfortunately, Hidan continued. "It doesn't take a fuckin' genius to figure out it's the same guy. They always come to you the same way: Smelling like a good fuck, clinging to a blanket an' covering themselves like a pansy, with stale cum all over their legs. He's gotta be sleeping around with guys, then bumping them off using you so nobody can tell who the hell the slut is!"

Deidara's rage mounted. If it wouldn't put his life in jeopardy...oh, the things he'd blow up on that abasing little religious prick's body right at this moment...

Luckily for Deidara, Kakuzu decided to join the conversation.

"Shut it, Hidan. You know damn well not all of us can be blessed with a sex-buddy like you are. That person's feeling a damn sight alone, and you'd better respect that." The stitch-man shot at his partner.

Hidan's cheeks stained red. No, not just red. Pure, deep crimson. "You swore you wouldn't tell anyone about us, you fuckin' bastard!" he hissed.

Itachi looked coldly at Hidan, uninterested-looking, as always. He took a sip from his coffee mug (a cute little number with 'I love you, 'Tashi-chan' scrawled on it, and a little white Icha Icha paradise label on the bottom) before putting his two cents in. "We all knew you two were in bed together. You practically announced it, the way you've been acting."

There were collective nods from around the table, and Hidan stood defeated. Even the leader knew Itachi was NOT to be opposed without severe physical and mental harm. The Jashin-worshipper sighed and decided to eat his breakfast in relative silence.

Itachi gave Deidara a glance, and a nod so barely noticeable that Deidara may have imagined it. The Uchiha was as close to a best friend as he could ask for. They worked on each other's hair every few days, and talked of the difficulties of their relationships. Dei loved being able to tell someone all his troubles without needing to worry about them being revealed. Though, to think of it, there was nothing Itachi couldn't figure out about someone if he wanted to. His behavior analyzing skills were beyond incredible, and that scared Deidara.

Deidara was just getting his fear of Itachi to rise when Tobi interrupted his thoughts.

(Bwahaha! Semi-cliffhanger! Possibly TBC!)

As I write this, I've already got ch.2 in the works. I'm terribly sorry this is so short, but I can't continue unless I know my writing style is half-decent.

So, please review! I have a certain review requirement, so please write your opinion or you'll never hear how this ends.

I promise that whenever I post a chapter, I'll have the next one in-progress. If I break that promise, feel free to virtually shoot me.


	3. CH 2: Hidden sunrise

"Ohayo, Sasori-san! You're looking good this morning! I trust you slept well? Here, have some of my pancakes!" the swirly-masked apprentice offered over-adoringly, shoving said pancakes into the puppet master's face.

Deidara's attention snapped to the entrance to the kitchen, his eyes immediately honing in on Sasori.

"Tobi, how many times do I have to tell you puppets don't eat before it finally soaks into you?"

Tobi sighed, sad his attempt at making friends with Sasori had failed. Zetsu patted him on the head and said he was a good boy. And the apprentice was very happy, so he pulled up his mask and gave Zetsu a thank-you peck on the cheek. The plant man blushed slightly, then pulled Tobi's mask down, muttering something about 'my bishi boyfriend's face', but nobody seemed to hear him.

Especially not Deidara.

------------------

(Normal POV)

He's looking at me like he knows something. It almost rips me to pieces to think he knows how terribly I've been acting these past two months. I can't look at him. I can't bear to show him how ugly and twisted I am, and that gorgeous ruby-red gaze locking on me is more than I can bear. I have to look away.

He lifts his head slowly, that adorable red fuzz moving with him slightly. /_why does he have to be so beautiful?_/

"Deidara." The way he says it makes it sound like he only wants to say my name, not get my attention. I'd laugh if I had it in me.

"Yes, Sasori-Danna,un?" Ugh...so terrible. I hate talking to him in the mornings. When the person I kill is fresh on my mind, I have a tendency to avoid him. I feel so ugly...too much so to be near him.

"I have something to discuss with you. Privately." My heart skips a beat. The way he worded that...I wonder if he'll ever know how I take those words. I pray to god, or Jashin, or whatever deity watches over a person like me , that I'm not blushing to a point where it's evident.

I slowly raise myself from my seat and walk to him. He waits until I reach him before leading me off. I can hear Hidan make a comment, and only pray that Itachi-kun will deal with any slander towards me. This is somehow answered, as I hear a yelp from the annoying prick in the following instants. I can feel myself smirking uncontrollably. But really, who could blame me? I hate the guy for all the abuse he's put me through.

Even when that's off my mind, my attention is far away from the path we're taking. I'm too busy admiring Sasori-Danna. His messy red hair is bouncing softly with every step he takes. His eyes are intent, focused, and yet they still remain at half-lidded level. His skin is so smooth and soft-looking...I can't help but want to lick it.

Ugh. I need to calm down. If I did that now, there's not a snowball's chance in hell he'd enjoy it.

"Something wrong, Deidara?" He looks at me. God, those eyes... it's like staring at a tiger's eyes. They feel hypnotic, almost like you could drown in them.

"No. Everything's fine, un. Why do you ask, un?" Of course, I'm lying. I have to look him in the eyes so he'll believe me. I think this is his kind of torture. If it's not, it sure feels like it.

"You've been acting very out of it these past weeks. I'm concerned it will affect your performance in upcoming missions. You should tell me what's wrong so that we can return you to your regular self." His voice is emotionless, as always. It stings to think that he only wants me to perform properly so that he doesn't have to clean up the mess I'm going to make if someone kills me. I sigh, with as much aggravation as I can possibly summon at this point.

"There's nothing wrong, un! I just told you that, un! Don't you ever listen, hmm?"

He shakes his head softly. "Alright. Apparently, you're not going to listen until I make you. So, as your superior, you will see me tomorrow to discuss this matter. We meet in the kitchen before sunrise."

Crap! I hate it when he plays the 'I've been here longer, so you have to listen to me or else' card. I can't fight against it.

I have to wipe the expression off my face and try to hold the emotion out of my voice before I speak. "Understood, un." I murmur, before flipping my cloak back and walking away.

------

The day has been dwindling down all too slowly. I really hate days when Sasori-Danna and myself don't have any specific tasks to perform. All I can do is try to get along with the Akatsuki members that also have nothing to do today. And, as you could probably guess, they're not the best of company. There's only Kisame, me, Danna, Kakuzu, and Hidan here today. Hidan's right out of the question. I refuse to talk to him for at least another hour or so. Itachi-san's out on his own again, and Kisame-san's not at all amusing without him. (Where the heck does he go on his days off?...) I don't care where Tobi and Zetsu are. As far as I'm concerned, Zetsu's doing me a favor by keeping Tobi out of my hair. Whatever he does to get that done is none of my concern. Danna...I can barely look at him. Plus, I have no clue where he is.

Which leaves Kakuzu.

Wow. Slim pickings. This could be dangerous. But it's better than nothing, so I make my way over to the living area. (I refuse to call it a room. There's only a few books, the couch, and a rug. It's too sparse to be comfy.) Kakuzu is talking to Hidan. They're not yelling at each other? How strange...

"But 'Kuzu...you were being so cruel. How could you tell everyone?" Hidan's being really quiet.

"Don't even start. You were wasting time with that senseless prattle. And you know how I hate wasting time."

"For Jashin's sake, Kakuzu! Just because of one damn saying of 'time is money', you don't want me to talk?" Oh, there's the yelling.

"No, I just think it's a waste of time for you to talk to anyone but me."

Both Hidan and I are shocked to speechlessness. Not like I wasn't shut up anyway, but for Hidan-san, that's unusual.

Kakuzu continues. "You understand, right?" He gets a nod from a suddenly very happy Hidan.

Kakuzu pulls Hidan downward, (he was raised in his sitting position) and I can see them kiss.

My chest is starting to hurt. I know I shouldn't look, but I can't for the life of me tear my eyes away. I'm looking at a private universe I wish I could understand. Believe me, if they haven't noticed me by this point, their minds are somewhere I won't get them.

I'm envious.

I want something like that.

More than most words can describe.

There's a dull pain in my chest as they pull a little closer, kissing growing just a bit more heated. I can't take it. I finally have to escape before I'm seen. I start to move out of the room, and for the first time, I really feel how horrible it is to be alone.

------

Thank Jashin that it's dark out. That means I don't have to wait long for today to be over.

I heave a sigh and rest on my bed. I wish this cloth could just swallow me whole, for all the now-dead bodies that have passed through it.

Heh. It's actually kind of funny how I look at myself on days like these. Normally, by now I'm feeling very unaccomplished, and I'm getting ready to go out and get drunk to forget.

Of course, I can't do that tonight. I've got to get up early so I can try to dispel Sasori-Danna's thinking I'm in pain.

I think I'll do alright in that aspect. I've lied so easily to him before that it's not even funny. I've made myself a key practitioner in the art of hiding how I feel with him. The only time I'm not able to do it is when he catches me off guard, like this morning.

And now I'm thinking about him.

Just great.

I won't be able to sleep now. Chances are my mind is going to dwell on him until I'm forced to lose consciousness. I don't want to do that. Not when I'm going to see him tomorrow.

Damn it all! Why is it he makes me feel so weak? Why do I have to do this when I know this feeling's going to get me killed one day? And it will, I'm sure of it. There have been far too many people who have been destroyed by love.

LOVE?!?! Did I just say that?

...I'm blowing this out of proportion.

I don't love him.

This is just the result of too many cold nights huddled helplessly against an emotionless doll without another's touch.

A crush, at most.

I _don't_ love him. Not at all.

And the fact I'm starting to cry doesn't mean I'm lying. I swear to god.

-----------------

OMFG CHAPPIE'S DONE!!!!!!!!!!

This one took a while. I'm glad I was able to complete it without too much interference. There are some things I want to work with in the next chapter, but it's all stuff I think you'll agree is enjoyable. o w O

I'm so glad I got to chapter 3, but I _**really**_ want to know what people think of it first before I post it.

PLEASE, review! Or you'll make Deidara even more emo! And we wouldn't want him to start cutting himself, now would we?


	4. Concluded

F R O M O H S O U P : A l r i g h t . T h i s w i l l b e m a j o r l y d i s a p p o i n t i n g t o t h e l o t o f y o u t h a t h a v e w a i t e d s o l o n g f o r a c o n c l u s i o n t o t h i s t h i n g , b u t i t w a s e i t h e r t h i s o r f o r e v e r r e m a i n i n g s i l e n t . P e r s o n a l l y , I d o n ' t t h i n k y o u a l l w a n t m e t o j u s t s t o p w r i t i n g a n d n o t a t l e a s t t i e u p l o o s e e n d s . T h e t h i n g i s t h a t i n t h e w r i t i n g o f t h i s s t o r y , a t r a g i c e v e n t h a p p e n e d t o m e . I c a n n o t a t t h i s p o i n t e v e n r e m e m b e r w h a t i t w a s , s i n c e m y l i f e a b o u t t h e n h a d p r e t t y m u c h g o n e t o c r a p a n d b a c k a n d a l o t o f b a d t h i n g s h a p p e n e d a t o n c e . B u t t h i s p a r t i c u l a r e v e n t w a s h e d u p a l l m y w i l l t o w r i t e w h a t w o u l d h a v e b e e n a t l e a s t t h e s e c o n d - t o - l a s t c h a p t e r o f t h e s t o r y . B y t h e t i m e i t w a s o v e r , o t h e r t h i n g s c a m e u p a n d I w a s p r e v e n t e d f r o m e v e n r e a l l y f e e l i n g , m u c h l e s s f e e l i n g l i k e a c h a r a c t e r a n d d o i n g m y w r i t i n g a s I n o r m a l l y d o . B y t h e t i m e t h e c r a p s t o p p e d g e t t i n g c h e w e d b y t h e f a n , a y e a r a n d a h a l f o r s o h a d p a s s e d a n d I c o u l d n ' t e v e n r e m e m b e r w h e r e I w a s t a k i n g t h i s . R e r e a d i n g t h i s n o l e s s t h a n f i v e t i m e s , I k n e w I c o u l d n ' t c o n t i n u e w r i t i n g i t t h e w a y i t w a s g o i n g . T h e s u n s h i n e y m o o d t h a t I w a s g o i n g t o b e g i n i n j e c t i n g i n t o t h i s w a s l o s t t o m e . S o , a l t h o u g h i t m a y c a u s e y o u t o h a t e m e , I h a v e t o a t l e a s t t e l l y o u w h a t I h a d b e e n i n t e n d i n g t o d o w i t h t h i s . D e i d a r a e v e n t u a l l y c r i e d h i m s e l f t o s l e e p , a n d w o k e t w o h o u r s l a t e r t o h e a d o f f t o t h e k i t c h e n w h e r e S a s o r i h a d b e e n w a i t i n g f o r h i m . I t a c h i w a l k e d o u t o f t h e k i t c h e n b e f o r e D e i d a r a g o t t h e r e , m a k i n g h i m v e r y c o n f u s e d . B u t t h e r e S a s o r i w a s a n d h e d i s m i s s e d I t a c h i ' s p r e s c e n c e a s n o t h i n g . H e e a s i l y p u s h e d t h i s a s i d e b y r e v e a l i n g t o D e i d a r a t h a t h e k n e w t h e b l o n d e h a d b e e n s l e e p i n g a r o u n d , a n d w h a t S a s o r i w a s a b o u t t o d o s h o w h i m w o u l d b e m u c h b e t t e r f o r h i m . A f t e r a l i t t l e e x p r e s s i o n o f t h e s h o c k D e i d a r a f e l t a t t h i s , t h e y w e n t w a l k i n g f o r a l o n g w h i l e . S a s o r i t a k e s D e i d a r a t o a m o u n t a i n l a k e , a n d s h o w s h i m t h e s u n r i s e . D e i d a r a i s c o m p l e t e l y b l o w n a w a y b y h o w p r e t t y i t i s , a n d h i s a t t e n t i o n g o e s e n t i r e l y t o t h e s e t t i n g . N o w , t h e r e w e r e t w o e n d i n g s f r o m t h a t p o i n t o n . S a s o r i i n a n y e v e n t w a s g o i n g t o s e e h o w g o r g e o u s D e i d a r a w a s i n m o r n i n g l i g h t a n d k i s s h i m s i l l y . T h e e a s i e r e n d i n g h a s S a s o r i p r o c e e d i n g t o d o D e i r i g h t t h e r e , a n d t h e n t h e y ' d b e h a p p y a n d i n e a c h o t h e r ' s p a n t s f r o m t h e n o n . T h e l o n g e r b u t s w e e t e r o u t c o m e h a s t h e m s t o p a f t e r t h a t , t h i n k a b o u t i t a l o n g w h i l e , e v e n h a v e i t m e s s u p a n i m p o r t a n t m i s s i o n , a n d e v e n t u a l l y g e t p u s h e d b y t h e i r m u t u a l ' f r i e n d ' I t a c h i t o b e t o g e t h e r b e f o r e t h e y a c t u a l l y r e a l i z e i t w a s n ' t j u s t t h e m b e i n g c a u g h t u p i n t h e m o m e n t a n d t h a t t h e y r e a l l y l o v e e a c h o t h e r . D e i c o n f r o n t s S a s o r i i n t h e p u p p e t b o y ' s r o o m , a n d T H E N t h e y g o o f f a n d l i v e h a p p i l y t o g e t h e r f o r a s l o n g a s S a s o r i l i v e s . I k n o w i t s o u n d s l i k e I ' m j u s t b e i n g l a z y a n d n o t d o i n g i t . . . b u t I ' m j u s t n o t t h e p e r s o n I w a s w h e n I b e g a n t h i s f a n f i c t i o n . I c a n ' t w r i t e i t w i t h t h e m i n d I s e t o u t t o w r i t e i t w i t h . . . . T h e r e . I h o p e y o u d o n ' t t h i n k i l l o f m e f o r t h i s . B u t a t l e a s t I t i e d u p t h e l o o s e e n d s a s b e s t I c o u l d . 


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